Each case of elder abuse is different, and the victims have their own stories to tell.
Often, they choose not to share, due to a misplaced sense of shame (thinking, wrongly, that it is somehow their fault) or through fear.
First-hand accounts are difficult to come by, and those that do exist are, for good reason, told anonymously.
In 2018, the ABC published several case studies of elder abuse recorded by the Northern Suburbs Community Legal Centre in Perth and submitted to a Western Australian government inquiry. In the same year, the National Association of Community Legal Centres (CLC) also published some case studies demonstrating the resilience of abuse survivors.
Here are a few of those stories:
Sylvia had been the victim of domestic violence as a child and throughout her married life. Her husband had been an alcoholic, and her four children were affected by alcohol and drugs.
Despite her own health setbacks, she was able to purchase a retirement unit and settle down – until her son moved in after his divorce.
He made it clear he expected her to sell her home and give him the money – making the point by setting fire to his bag while it was sitting on her loungeroom floor.
She ended up buying a house for him. Due to the intervention of doctors and social workers, Sylvia moved into aged care.
Elba was in a similar situation after her daughter moved back home and began to have regular drinking sessions there with her friends.
Despite telling her mother she was “a stupid, useless, old woman” who would not survive without her, the daughter was too drunk to assist Elba when she had a fall in the middle of the night.
With the help of the Older People’s Rights Service and the police, Elba got an order to have her daughter vacate the premises.
Danika, who is from an Eastern European country, married an Australian man in 2006 and moved here to live with him. The husband, who psychologically abused his wife, had many extra-marital relationships and the marriage ended.
A CLC social worker assisted Danika with urgent temporary housing and later successfully appealed a government decision to refuse her housing.
The social worker helped Danika form social connections and feel resilient enough to proceed with her legal issues. Lawyers from the CLC advised Danika about her legal rights to a property settlement and spouse maintenance.
They secured her right to remain in the unit until urgent housing was obtained.
Lawyers then engaged in lengthy negotiations to achieve a settlement in favour of Danika, which was drafted up and approved by a Family Court judge.
Lin, who spoke almost no English, was estranged from her alcoholic husband and was living downstairs in the same dwelling as her violent, widowed son and his young children.
She feared for her safety and wellbeing of her grandchildren and needed help because her son had threatened to kill her. She suspected that her son, who owed her money, had told the police she was mad and to ignore her.
Lin felt that she should move out of the home but had insufficient income and would be ineligible for social housing.
The CLC gave her advice on how to get a divorce and property settlement and referred her to a bilingual support worker who could help her address her concerns for the children, as well as give her emotional and social support.
She received help obtaining a domestic violence order against her son and is receiving ongoing community support and counselling.
Together, these stories demonstrate that it’s possible to escape elder abuse through personal resilience and the help of others, including those from not-for-profit organisations.
If you or somebody you know needs assistance, the first step is to reach out.
Resources:
Community Legal Centres Queensland: W: www.communitylegalqld.org.au P: 07 3392 0092.
Queensland Elder Abuse Prevention Unit operates a helpline and links to other resources. W: https://eapu.com.au P: 1300 651 192.
1800 ELDERHelp is a free call phone number that automatically redirects callers seeking information and advice on elder abuse to the relevant phone service. P: 1800 353 374. If you need immediate assistance in an emergency or life-threatening situation, call triple zero (000).
Links: ABC, Community Legal Aid (Queensland)
